The Republican Evangelical Bible

Alexandra Petri, on fire again:

Recently, Tony Perkins, president of the Family Research Council, talked to Politico’s Edward-Isaac Dovere to explain why evangelical Christians such as he were still supporting President Trump. He had a lot to say! For instance, he observed that evangelicals “were tired of being kicked around by Barack Obama and his leftists. And I think they are finally glad that there’s somebody on the playground that is willing to punch the bully.”

“What happened to turning the other cheek?” Dovere asked.

“You know, you only have two cheeks,” Perkins replied. He went on: “Christianity is not just about being a welcoming mat that people can stomp their feet on.”

Well said. It is past time that evangelicals stop letting the Bible dictate how they feel about things. This nonsense book full of terrible, outdated opinions has kicked them around long enough, and it is good that they are taking a stand and making some updates. I have taken the liberty of revising this ancient text in light of this new attitude…

Please use the following updated edition of the Beatitudes and other scriptural highlights:

Turn the other cheek.You only have two cheeks.

Suffer little children to come unto me unless of course they are immigrants who all are probably affiliated with ISIS in some way and we are quite right to want nothing to do with them.

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.I will be the greatest president God ever created. 

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will pay no inheritance tax.

Brilliant.  Please read it all.

Meanwhile, former RNC Chairman Michael Steele seems to have belatedly realized the nature of the people he’s been enabling all these years:

Michael Steele, the former chair of the Republican National Committee, has just about had it with evangelical Christian leaders who support President Donald Trump no matter what.

On Monday, Tony Perkins, head of the conservative Christian nonprofit Family Research Council, said Trump gets “a mulligan” or “do-over” over allegations that he paid porn star Stormy Daniels to keep quiet over their reported affair.

 Steele wasn’t having it.

“I have a very simple admonition at this point,” Steele said on “Hardball” on MSNBC. “Just shut the hell up and don’t ever preach to me about anything ever again. I don’t want to hear it.”

Steele added:

“After telling me how to live my life, who to love, what to believe, what not to believe, what to do and what not to do and now you sit back and the prostitutes don’t matter? The grabbing the you-know-what doesn’t matter? The outright behavior and lies don’t matter? Just shut up.”

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Map of the day

Oh man do I love this– can’t wait to show my kids (though, at least one will encounter it through this post).  Current countries mapped onto Pangaea.

Why I love Republicans

Okay, I don’t.  But, maybe I don’t “hate” them nearly as much as similarly strong Democrats.  Why?  My agreeable and extroverted personality.  Seriously.  That’s what the latest research from Steven Webster suggests.  The abstract:

One of the most important developments within the American electorate in recent years has been the rise of affective polarization. Whether this is due to notions of group-based conflict or ideological disagreement, Americans increasingly dislike the opposing political party and its supporters. I contribute to this growing literature on affective polarization by showing how differences in individuals’ Big Five personality traits are predictive of both whether an individual dislikes the opposing party and the degree to which they express this hostility. Modeling negative affect toward the opposing party as a two-stage process, I find that Extraverted individuals are less likely to have negative affective evaluations of the opposing party. Additionally, conditional upon disliking the opposing party, my results indicate that higher levels of Agreeableness lowers the degree to which individuals dislike the out-party. [emphasis mine]  Moreover, these relationships are substantively stronger than common sociodemographic predictors such as age, race, and educational attainment.

Well, that’s pretty cool.  And, actually, I really don’t have extreme negative emotions towards Republicans.  I work at that as part of being a serious social scientist studying politics.  And, especially in my job, I certainly don’t need an automatic negative affective response towards a good portion of my students.  Presumably, though, my extroversion and agreeableness make this easier for me.  Now, that introverted wife of mine hates Republicans.  Kidding!  Besides, she’s very agreeable :-).

Anyway, pretty cool stuff.

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